The Formula To A Good Movie/Song

I was listening to "Open Up" by Dispatch (who are fucking awesome, by the way) today, and the song got me thinking. Here are the lyrics (or at least part of them). Check the song out here:.

VERSE:

they were looking for me when I came to
they were looking for me when I came back
said hey you, you're looking very suspicious
I said relax man get off my back
I said relax man get off my back

PRE-CHORUS:

I, I, I ain't opposed to seeking justice
but you're going about it all wrong
the man you're looking for does not exist
he's just a figment of the higher man's tounge

CHORUS:
(and they say)
open up we're comming inside
you can't run so you may as well hide
we got the place covered from head to toe, head to toe
open up we're comming inside
what's it feel like to know you're going to die
on the other side of the row
on the other side of the row

VERSE:

so they took me down to the gallows
and this boy he say to me
why do you smile when the rope's around your neck
I said I tell you boy when I get back
I said I tell you boy when I get back

PRE-CHORUS:

I, I, I ain't opposed to seeking justice
but you're going about it all wrong
the man you're looking for does not exist
he's just a figment of the higher man's tounge
he's just a victim of the higher man's tounge

CHORUS:
(and they say)
open up we're comming inside
you can't run so you may as well hide
we got the place covered from head to toe, head to toe
open up we're comming inside
what's it feel like to know you're going to die
on the other side of the row
on the other side of the row

BRIDGE:
hands above your head
que le via bien
step out of line we'll and fill you with lead

how are we to know that your not a liar
don't you see whe have a job to do
and our job is the law
you fit the description of a criminal crosser
we believe that he is you and that is your flaw
that is your flaw...
that is your flaw...

CHORUS:

and they say
open up we're comming inside
you can't run so you may as well hide
we got the place covered from head to toe, head to toe
open up we're comming inside
what's it feel like to know you're going to die
on the other side of the row
on the other side of the row

Now, if you're too impatient to read all of that, then here's the explanation: There's this guy who's on the run who claims that he's innocent. And he sings all the verses and the prechoruses. The police sing the chorus and the bridge, where they ask the man to surrender, and where they justify themselves. Both sides of the argument are shown, and both are shown to be convincing. The last chorus of the song is a very soft one, and it gradually builds into this power packed outro, which serves as the 'final battle'. This is an awesome example of how onomatopaeic music can be. The lyric doesn't tell us that the police kill the man, but the music does, and that's why it's so awesome.

Anyway, the whole point of this is the two voices, or the two people, or most basically, the good vs bad battle within the song. THIS is the secret formula for awesomeness. EVERY movie/song in which there's an epic musical battle is a hit, or is at least one to remember.

In the movie: The Pick of Destiny, the final battle (Beezleboss) between Tenacious D and the devil is a long single song, and it shows the kicking off, progress and end of the full battle in ONE song. Incidentally, the devil is played by Dave Grohl.

In 8 Mile, the rap face-off shows the good guy and the bad guy clearly demarkated, with Eminem bringing the odds against himself by going first and doing such an awesome job that the other rapper had no response.

In Padosan, Kishore Kumar and Mehmood both vie for the love of the lead actress via song (Ek chatur naar karke shringaar/Ek chatur naar badi hoshiyaar).

I can't think of anymore right now, but you get the point right? Musical face-offs are awesome, and everyone knows and agrees. Just shove it in your movie/album somewhere, and you've got it made.

PS: My band 'The Hoodwink Circle' has a song called "Mirror'd", which is about this guy who is singing in front of his mirror (the verse), and the mirror sings back to him in the pre chorus. Finally, they both sing the chorus together. Both parts are sung by different people (Vocalist sings the verses, the guitarist sings the pre-choruses). The song's there on our site. The site's there on this page. Sorry about the inadvertent PR. Emphasis on INADVERTANT.

The Brothel

I get a lotta shit from my fraaands for not having a girlfriend. You know what i mean, right? When all the people around you aren't single, and you're left alone. Except for Nissim, of course. Sorry, man. But it's just you and me now. Anyhow, they keep telling me about how i should get a girlfriend and 'utilize my own resources'. By that, they mean my house. My empty house. Anyway, this blog isn't about me not having a girlfriend. It's about the house.

Hypo-fucking-critical bastards my friends are. In a week, i'll have people staying over at least 3 nights. I've even been called home when i was out myself (i didn't go back, of course. But still). They'll all go to 'chill' with their respective women, and when it's too late to go home, they'll come here. I SAID, they'll come here (You can't escape the blues, man). It's like a fucking whorehouse. But you gotta admit, it IS awesome.

Initially, my friends used to come with their 'female companions', and go to seperate rooms to have 'engaging conversation'. Not saaaax, of course. But a little making out and shit. Anyway, it got outta hand when i left my friends home alone. It's not like they were humping and all, but my maid still caught them kissing, right? At least, i hope it was just that. I really don't wanna know. So after that little episode, couples weren't allowed home for a while. It's not happened at home since, and personally i AM a little glad.

Not because i don't want people fooling around at my place. No no. But because i don't WANT to know. You know, if it happens outside my place, i won't really know, right? At my place. Ugh.

PS: I stayed over at karuns place about thrice a week in the hols, so i can't talk. But i will, because it is my blog. Hah. I win.

"Get The Junk Out!"

Today, as i left my room to make that fateful trip to the dining room for dinner, i chanced upon my mother in not the best of moods. The wise thing to do on her part (well, the less womanly thing anyway) would've been to ignore me and go about her brooding/frustration. That i would happily tolerate. However, my mother being the orderliness freak that she is, immediately reminded me of my promise to clean out my cupboard. Her bad mood coupled with the fact that i had promised to do the said deed weeks ago proved enough persuasion for me to finally go and do it. And i did. Believe it or not. I just cleaned out ONE compartment, which took me about half an hour.

You wouldn't believe the stuff that came out. I'm still recovering from the nostalgic jolt that i just experienced. It's the kinda stuff that can be illustrated by the following example:

The Scene: Everybody Loves Raymond. Raymond's having a garage sale, and his wife (i forget her name) makes him clean out his cupboard to "get rid of all of his junk". In doing so he finds his prized Mickey Mantle (or some baseball player with a similar name) signed baseball, which his wife refers to as 'junk that you'd forgotten about till you just found it again'. To which Raymond says, "I hadn't forgotten about it, i'd tucked it away carefully at the back of my cupboard for safekeeping."

I found all my old notes, my class 11 assignments, my school board exam papers, my school answer papers, my school report cards, my school evaluation cards, my assignments, all of my handouts, my projects etc etc etc.

Anyway, i also found a lot of junk (literally) that my maid had just dumped in my cupboard, and hence i put it next to the bin. By junk, i mean my own junk. I'm not gonna ruin someone else's memories by such loose term usage; even though this IS Politically Incorrect Tendencies. If my mum saw what i'd kept, i'm positive she'd throw away half of the stuff, and seeing that it really has no point anyway, i can see her point. I still keep it, though. And fuck you, i'm not justifying myself.

I have an uncle who'd kept his toys and shit from his childhood carefully for his kid to play with, not realising that they'd get outdated. And they did. His kid (my cousin) plays his nintendo and suchshite, while the uncles old toys lie in the attic. Throughout my childhood, my folks cited the same uncle as an example every time i broke my toys (the few toys that i fucking got). Now, i wish i could say 'HA!' to them, but cheekiness is not tolerated in the family.

PS: Of course, the uncle could've kept his toys because of cheapness. You never know. Although i doubt it, seeing that he had this high paying corporate job with Aditya Birla. Anyway, now they're fucked na. Yup, he probably foresaw that, and hence kept his toys. Now he'll sell them and live the rest of his life on the money. Yup, that's why he kept the toys. Balls to the kids.

PPS: Dinner was conveniently forgotten about, by the way. Ciao.

College Festival Rants

I will now proceed to quote Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley, in Harry Potter & The Goblet Of Fire:

The Context: At the Yule Ball (something similar to a prom), Hermione goes with Viktor Krum, a Bulgarian student from the infamous school 'Durmstrang'. Incidentally, Viktor is pitched against Harry in the triwizard cup, and is hence his rival.

Hermione (Defending herself to Ron): "The Triwizard Cup was setup to promote international magic friendliness and cooperation."

To which Ron replies: "That's not what you're doing! You're fraternising with the enemy!"

In many ways, this is similar to what happens in college festivals in Mumbai. Well, at least those with a lot of competing colleges. There's always a strong hatred for the rivals, and 'fraternising with the enemy' is instant ostracization for ze person involved. This doesn't work out as healthy competition at all. In fact, it doesn't even help unity building within college contingents. It's just this vicious rivalry, which has no point or reason.

An Example: At our college festival, one of the college contingents raised an issue when a competing college's student had come as as judge for a Junkapella (one of our events), citing bias as an overruling influence in judgement. Fair enough. Anyway, i heard the event head tell this to one of the committee members, to which the committee member responded: "Which contingent raised this issue?" in a weary oh-i-hate-them-whiny-fucking-contingents voice. The event head replied "Which contingent do you think?", with an obvious look on his face. I was baffled, but the committee member immediately said: "Jaihind?".

People forget the whole point of college festivals. I've seen organisers so fucking anal about pointless minor issues, i've seen organisers so stressed because of continual complaints all around, and i've seen participants shamelessly poke fun at the organisers. Like, you know, mean stuff. People forget that the aim is to make friends and interact.

I could write this so much better. Better said, this could be written so much better. I've seen college festivals, and for some reason, i can't transfer the bitterness that i feel into writing. But it is sad. With bigger prizes in events, the competition becomes more and more unhealthy. The reason for the event's existence is diluted, and the point/aim of the event is lost in the frenzy to win. And most of the contingents don't even enjoy themselves. Ask everyone (not just anyone) who goes to Malhar.

"You're Off!"

I've been recording a few tracks here and there, and the biggest headache involved is playing 'in time'. See, when you record a song, you start off by deciding it's tempo, which is measured in bpm, or beats per minute. Once you have a bpm set in mind, you set the metronome/click track, and start recording. You do this to 'stay in time', ie so that you don't go off or keep changing/fluctuating your tempo; and it's an essential part of recording music.

Of course, people can argue that one doesn't really need a metronome, and that tiny fluctuations don't matter. I guess that's okay in a live recording, as you can rely purely on band 'tightness'. But when you're recording each track seperately, you need something to go by. Hence the click track. Metronome. Whatever-the-fuck-ever.

Anyway, the biggest problems that most musicians face is recording with a click track on, as one tends to ignore the tempo and 'go with the flow', which most often leads to tempo fluctuations. This is called 'going off'. It's the worst fucking insult you can give to a musician. Only continual practise with a metronome can help, and since noone does this, they all get fucked when it comes to recording in studios etc.

The other day, i had to go and record a song in a studio, and try as i might, i couldn't do one perfect take. I kept going off and off and off, and the most disheartening sight is that of the engineer frustrated. Finally, after about 4 hours of non-stop recording, i managed to finish my song. My part of the song. Painful, but i managed.

I had to get it out of my system, sorry. I know this is a boring post. Sigh. The worst part (for you) is that this actually has helped me.

Heroes Vs Lost

This is the question isn't it? The ultimate question. Douglas Adams had it all wrong. No one cares about life and suchshite. It's all about sci-fi, man. Sci-fucking-fi. Heroes Vs Lost. The Ultimate Question.

Before i delve any deeper into this topic, let me first state that i care not whether they are in different time slots, or if they are both NBC shows, or if they aren't really competitors, or even if they have 'totally different Target Audiences'. I say what i see, and i dig no further.

The Perception: (Disclaimer-this may not be true)

Heroes is more childish, and definitely has more youngster appeal. Kids (12 up) can comprehend it with relative ease, non-linear time frames notwithstanding. It was fucking kickass initially, but it lost (heh) steam halfway through the second season, and most fans simply stopped watching due to pure boredom. Most of the characters, though well built, are shown to be too confused about priorites. The resemblance to x-men is too uncanny. The most powerful people are the biggest panzees.

Lost is complex, mature, and an acquired taste (unless you see the thriller parts of the episodes). It's really fucking confusing, and has intense character work. Very original plot line, expect the unexpected (sheesh).

Ishaan's Opinion:

I wasn't too fond of Lost till i saw 'The Constant', and later episodes. I'm a sucker for time-travel, and Lost depicted something that i had never even considered. My interest was revitalised, till the season finale (Season 4). I've heard that there's much more time travel in the coming season, and i'll have to wait and see. I don't have high hopes, though. As opposed to Heroes, where i have HUGE hopes. Heroes always revolves around saving the world, the battle to be recognized and the struggle against being pushed into the background. Quite simple, but the depiction of the superpowers/abilities is what i feel differentiates it from other such concepts. Each power has it's own theme (as in, musical score), and this is the constant every time an ability is shown. I quite like this.

You know, i'd like to leave this post with an open ending. Something like: 'i leave you with the facts, deduce for yourselves', or 'i will now let you draw your own conclusions', or 'i leave you with the opinions, make up your own mind'. But i have to say this: To me, it's just superpowers with time travel Vs confusion about whether time travel exists ot not/and a whole lotta other shite.

And Heroes wins. FUCK Lost.

PS: I will admit, however, that i've seen each and every Heroes episode, as opposed to just 4 seasons of Lost. However, just as knowing 2 chords can qualify you to be a lead guitarist in a punk rock band, this qualifies me to do this comparision.

PPS: I do love punk rock.

PPPS: What the fuck is Prison Break?

Spontaneity Anonymous

People keep talking about how therapeutic it is to write a blog spontaneously. The pleasure that one experiences with the release of the emotions via the blog, and yadda yadda. I picture it like this: One starts writing, keeps writing, keeps 'going with the flow', finishes writing, and presses 'post'. This, to me, seems like the ideal spontaneous blog. If this is how it's done, then i am ze complete failure.

I try, you know. I try my best to be grammatically correct the first time i write. I try my best to sound good the first time i pen my sentences. But i seemply CANNOT. For this reason, i have to reread all my posts at least twice to ensure that no grammar errors filter through. Now, during this grammar-error-filter process, i find that when i reread my shite, i tend to edit out a lot of the stuff i originally meant to write; either because i cringe at the it's thought, or because it just 'doesn't feel right'. Hence, i lose all spontaneity.

It's near impossible to be happy with the first attempt; at least for me. So even if i try to pour my emotions out onto ze blog, i'll end up editing out all the parts that 'sound too faggoty'. Hence, i end up with a fucking normal post. With no emotion whatsoEVER.

I guess (alright, HOPE) this'll change after a lot of blogging; but i highly doubt it.

Some Nice Trivia: The word 'blog' doesn't exist in the UK Dictionary.